I am unable to fully commit to living here, for several reasons. If I didn’t have a boyfriend waiting to jump elsewhere, I just might be more focused. But why should I invest time and energy in building a new community for myself when I don’t envision myself staying here? In grad school it was a little easier, since I was thrown in with 40 peers and we knew we were leaving after two years, so there was simultaneously an excuse to bond together and also recognize that it wasn’t permanent.
There were two places I immediately targeted as potential places to get involved and meet new people; a church and the alum sorority group. However, due to visiting Nicholas I’ve had to miss all four events planned by those groups over the last three months. I was really happy to find a 20s/30s group at one of the churches I go to, and I am so sad that I haven’t actually met any of them yet.
And even when I’m trying to stay focused on my non-FM life, I still manage to miss out. It’s looking less likely that I’ll be able to see Martha this weekend, even though we’ll be about 2.5 mi away from each other. I miss out on happy hours and wine nights and everything else. Although I am super happy I can still participate in book club via Skype. 🙂
It’s just a difficult balancing act.